Friday, August 06, 2004
by demand
this is a replicated e-mail thread, and as such, you might understand it better if you start at the bottom. but then again my comments are better appreciated if you start from the top (which is how i made them in the first place). so there's a minor quandary, isn't there?
Somebody wrote (to me):
Dude.. please blog this . it’s forwardable material.. =) and I totally get your point. =)
-----Original Message-----
From: you're kidding me if you think i'm going to put my name here.
Sent: Thursday, August 05, 2004 8:21 PM
To: you're also kidding if you think i'm going to put who i was emailing.
Subject: Re: FW: Soulful Relationship
i'm not against them, per se. i'm against the proliferation of them.
y'see, fundamentally, we all are supposed to know what and what not to do- at least that's what i think. and i also think that relationships are best experienced. just like you don't know what a good cup of coffee is until you've had it, you don't know what good thing it is you got until you've felt it, breathed it, let it run through your fingers, (don't stop me, i'm on a fucking roll here.) and though experiences may not always be what you want, they are more often than not what you need. you might get burned on your first cup of coffee, so the second time around, you make sure you let it cool first. if you don't, you get burned again. but still we want more. and it's never enough that we read brochures on how robust, or rich and frothy, or full-flavored a first-brew cup of coffee is. We want to smell it, taste it, swirl it between our tongues. thirst is never in the tummy, unlike hunger. it's in the mouth, a fundamental vessel of the senses. (now, how that has to do with anything, i don't know, but it just sounded like a fucking profound way to end the paragraph.)
my point is that we don't need brochures to tell us about coffee. if you look at the counter with free brochures in every Starbucks, you'll find that it's still largely stacked with 'em. we don't need things like brochures to confuse the issue. we don't need to know how much work was put into whatever it is (and making us feel unworthy of it), or how exquisite it should be (thereby making us unappreciative if we don't feel the same), or the 'proper' way of enjoying it (which makes us go, 'are we doing this right?'). we need to feel it for ourselves, to sense, to breathe, to make sure that, should we be overwhelmed, we are overwhelmed by what our senses voluntarily feel, and not forced to receive. this isn't paint-by-numbers, or your recipe good for 4. this is how we feel, the way we are to think through emotions, the way we live with someone else, the way we love. coffee-making may follow standards and guides, strict or not, but how we drink it, we enjoy it, never does. and neither should the way we experience our relationships.
now i know why they relate coffee to everything. =)
she wrote:
How come you’re so against these type of stuff? =)
-----Original Message-----
From: me [mailto:]
Sent: Thursday, August 05, 2004 5:58 PM
To: her
Subject: Re: FW: Soulful Relationship
o ayan dude ha, just to point out to you that this discovery weekend crap going around just never goes out of style...
and i'm definitely not going to put who started the whole mess wrote:
For all my married friends and those who plan to get married someday.Ü
this is a replicated e-mail thread, and as such, you might understand it better if you start at the bottom. but then again my comments are better appreciated if you start from the top (which is how i made them in the first place). so there's a minor quandary, isn't there?
Somebody wrote (to me):
Dude.. please blog this . it’s forwardable material.. =) and I totally get your point. =)
-----Original Message-----
From: you're kidding me if you think i'm going to put my name here.
Sent: Thursday, August 05, 2004 8:21 PM
To: you're also kidding if you think i'm going to put who i was emailing.
Subject: Re: FW: Soulful Relationship
i'm not against them, per se. i'm against the proliferation of them.
y'see, fundamentally, we all are supposed to know what and what not to do- at least that's what i think. and i also think that relationships are best experienced. just like you don't know what a good cup of coffee is until you've had it, you don't know what good thing it is you got until you've felt it, breathed it, let it run through your fingers, (don't stop me, i'm on a fucking roll here.) and though experiences may not always be what you want, they are more often than not what you need. you might get burned on your first cup of coffee, so the second time around, you make sure you let it cool first. if you don't, you get burned again. but still we want more. and it's never enough that we read brochures on how robust, or rich and frothy, or full-flavored a first-brew cup of coffee is. We want to smell it, taste it, swirl it between our tongues. thirst is never in the tummy, unlike hunger. it's in the mouth, a fundamental vessel of the senses. (now, how that has to do with anything, i don't know, but it just sounded like a fucking profound way to end the paragraph.)
my point is that we don't need brochures to tell us about coffee. if you look at the counter with free brochures in every Starbucks, you'll find that it's still largely stacked with 'em. we don't need things like brochures to confuse the issue. we don't need to know how much work was put into whatever it is (and making us feel unworthy of it), or how exquisite it should be (thereby making us unappreciative if we don't feel the same), or the 'proper' way of enjoying it (which makes us go, 'are we doing this right?'). we need to feel it for ourselves, to sense, to breathe, to make sure that, should we be overwhelmed, we are overwhelmed by what our senses voluntarily feel, and not forced to receive. this isn't paint-by-numbers, or your recipe good for 4. this is how we feel, the way we are to think through emotions, the way we live with someone else, the way we love. coffee-making may follow standards and guides, strict or not, but how we drink it, we enjoy it, never does. and neither should the way we experience our relationships.
now i know why they relate coffee to everything. =)
she wrote:
How come you’re so against these type of stuff? =)
-----Original Message-----
From: me [mailto:]
Sent: Thursday, August 05, 2004 5:58 PM
To: her
Subject: Re: FW: Soulful Relationship
o ayan dude ha, just to point out to you that this discovery weekend crap going around just never goes out of style...
and i'm definitely not going to put who started the whole mess wrote:
For all my married friends and those who plan to get married someday.Ü
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