Sunday, May 17, 2009

on fate. and kfc. and poker hands.

i was on the tollway last month, when i had a craving to have kfc for lunch. since i knew i didn't have enough money for the tollway, either, i stopped at one of those larger gasoline stations (the ones that make you feel like they're the last oasis before you head on to nowhere) to top up both my wallet and my stomach.

by the time i found the money machine, i had worked myself up for either a zinger meal or a 2-piece chicken meal. but i discovered that the machine was unavailable to dispense cash. and, checking what cash i had left, i had no money for either meal!

well, at this point, i decided that any kfc fix was better than nothing, so i figured to max out my money, and got a rice bowl meal which i had never tried. truth is, it wasn't so bad, either, but i never got the full satisfaction of the kfc experience i felt i would've gotten with something else (that i couldn't afford).

but my tummy (not my mind) was filled, and, having already decided that i'd just stop at another gas station instead for money, i was feeling chipper when i passed the money machine again. lo and behold, the machine was now 'online' and able to dispense cash. and that full feeling turned slightly into a letdown, knowing that, had i just waited, i might've had the taste of soggy, colonel sanders' 11-herbs-and-spices chicken goodness in my mouth.

i had to smile, inspite of my frustration then. i was thinking that, indeed, fate does have a sense of humor. i could just imagine her (and yes, i think fate has a feminine slant) laughing at my look on seeing the money machine asking me to insert my card in the slot so that we could begin. well played, fate. well played.

but it's not about how fate plays her tricks on you; it's not about the cards you're dealt. it's still (and i guess it'll always be) about how you play your hand at a given time. fate will throw her curveballs on her own; she'll test you with others just to see who gives in first; and oh, sometimes she'll give you combos that'll make you terribly nauseated. but you can always make do with what's thrown to you. sometimes you really don't have much to work with, but things work out in the end when you do.

and there, folks, is the catchword- 'work'. it's nice to think that fate's gonna deal you a royal flush someday, but while waiting for it, why not build your pot with what you got? and if you never get your royal flush, take pause and look; you just might find that you never really needed it, after all.

about a week later, i had my 2-piece meal. and, ironically, even while i was savoring onion salt+pepper+paprika+chili powder+basil+msg in my mouth (hmm.. 6 out of 11), i knew then that it still wasn't what i had been wanting. so the other day, i had my zinger. and, yes, i had my fill; but while that feeling was now really satiated, it also had a tinge that it really was no big deal. so i didn't mind that it took me a month to get that craving down. because between that rice bowl, and the 2-piece meal, and the zinger, i learned that sometimes what you spend time looking for turns out to be something you didn't really need to be.

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